Today I heard an amazing story told by one of my favourite priests in this city. I've quoted it in full below:
”I’m reminded today of Albert Einstein, the great physicist who this month has been honored by Time magazine
as the “Man of the Century.” Einstein was once traveling from Princeton
on a train when the conductor came down the aisle, punching the tickets
of every passenger. When he came to Einstein, Einstein reached in his
vest pocket. He couldn’t find his ticket, so he reached in his trouser
pockets.
“It wasn’t there. He looked in his briefcase but couldn’t find it.
Then he looked in the seat beside him. He still couldn’t find it.
“The conductor said, ‘Dr. Einstein, I know who you are. We all know
who you are. I’m sure you bought a ticket. Don’t worry about it.’
“Einstein nodded appreciatively. The conductor continued down the
aisle punching tickets. As he was ready to move to the next car, he
turned around and saw the great physicist down on his hands and knees
looking under his seat for his ticket.
“The conductor rushed back and said, ‘Dr. Einstein, Dr. Einstein,
don’t worry, I know who you are; no problem. You don’t need a ticket.
I’m sure you bought one.’ Einstein looked at him and said, ‘Young man, I
too, know who I am. What I don’t know is where I’m going.”
Having said that Billy Graham continued,
“See the suit I’m wearing? It’s a brand new suit. My children, and
my grandchildren are telling me I’ve gotten a little slovenly in my old
age. I used to be a bit more fastidious. So I went out and bought a new
suit for this luncheon and one more occasion.\
“You know what that occasion is? This is the suit in which I’ll be buried.
“But when you hear I’m dead, I don’t want you to immediately remember the suit I’m wearing.
“I want you to remember this: I not only know who I am. I also know where I’m going.”
__________________________________________________________________________
This homily was very relevant for my current life situation. I have
accomplished many of the goals I set out to do in my life in the short,
mid, and long term. And now, given this place in my life, I do not know
where to turn next. And the consequence of uncertainty for me is a
kind of anxiety I am learning to live with. It is an uncomfortable position for a millienial, since we are people who are given too much choice in general.
To me, the most important thing is a direction, a drive. These tasks are just upkeep, and upkeep is not growth. And I am someone who needs to be growing, moving forward. I don't want to stay as I am, I want to be better than I am. I enjoy my life on the whole...but I am in a place where I need to define the meaning that is in my life. I need to think a little harder about the direction of my life.
I am starting to redefine where that drive is coming from, and also what it is that drives me in life. I have reached the point where I believe in myself, but I am still working on finding out how to turn my own beliefs into reality around me. And, that, perhaps, is the next step in my journey as an adult.
Sunday, April 28, 2013
I have internet again! Time to write.
I was without internet for nearly a week. If I didn't have it at work, I may have died from withdrawal. Just goes to show how much we rely on instant communication these days. Also helps a lot of the work that I do is based on social media.
Monday, April 08, 2013
TOW: Inspiration
You know, a lot has been said about inspiration. Probably my favourite long form speech about inspiration, especially for writers, has been said by one of my least favourite writers, Elizabeth Gilbert.
While I don't subscribe to Eat, Pray, Love (though that mantra, as a whole, sits well with me) I do believe in the words she says as part of her TED talk. Namely, in a more condensed form, that genius is 1 percent inspiration, and 99 per cent perspiration.
But Gilbert says it more kindly than that. Instead, she talks about a writer's muse. Because, any writer that has written more than ten words, knows that feeling of being possessed by something. An idea, a desire to continue, an almost inhuman want to write, and write well. Danielle Steel, as much as she might not be considered literature's finest...still understand the written process very well. And her process mirrors mine, I find *Excerpts taken from Danielle Steel's blog:
Very early in my career ( I only had one baby when I started writing), I figured out that if you wait for time and the opportunity to present themselves—it never happens, and you don’t get anything done. So I made writing my priority, and I turned down just about everything else. For about 30 years, I never had lunch with friends, never broke into my writing time. The only greater priority in my life was my family, my children and husband. They always came first—but after that, I turned down just about everything else so I could write.
My process is that first I have an idea, and it may only be a tiny kernel of an idea, something that intrigues me. It may just be a thought, a tiny piece of something about a person, a news item, something in history, or a philosophy about life. I start making notes, and do so for several months usually, as the story emerges in my head. Sometimes I sit for hours, just staring into space, pursuing the idea. And then about the characters to go with it. And then one day, I sit down at my typewriter and write the outline for the story. By then, I pretty much know the story. And the outline tells the story chapter by chapter. The outlines are anywhere from 40 to 70 pages long. And then I go over the outline, correcting it and making changes. And when I’m comfortable with it, I send it to my editor and agent, and they suggest some changes. I make those changes if I agree with them, without compromising the essence of the book, and then send the outline to my publisher. And by then, it is a total mess, with things crossed out, corrected, written over, full of asterisks ( my editors hate the mess I make!! and beg me to change my typewriter ribbon more often, which I forget to do, and when I’m excited about what I’m writing). And then my publisher suggests changes too, so I do another re-write on the outline. And whenever I write, I do nothing else. That’s all I do, so as not be distracted from the book.
Once the outline is set, I put it away, and let it simmer for a while. And I am usually working on 3 to 5 different books, in various stages at the same time. I work it all the way through to the end of the story, and then put it away for a while, and it continues to cook somewhere, in the back of my head.
When I start a book, it is like climbing a mountain. Brutal, exhausting, an endurance contest. I start the book and don’t leave my desk until the first draft is finished. I work from the outline, but the book just flows on its own (like a movie I see and hear in my head—and sometimes even I’m surprised at what I’m seeing and hearing!) I cry at the sad parts, laugh at something funny one of the characters said. My life becomes totally populated by the people of the book. I don’t talk to anyone (except my kids when they call me), don’t return calls, don’t see anyone, and don’t leave the house. I go from my bed to my desk, to my bathtub at the end of my workday, then back to bed, and then back to work. I work about 20 to 22 hours straight, sleep for 3 or 4 hours, and then go back to work. And I do that until I have told the story and the first draft is finished. Michelangelo called it ‘stealing it from the stone’, when he carved a statue. I’m almost afraid to stop working at night because I’m afraid I’ll forget where I was going with the story, but I don’t forget. And I keep on going until I’m through. That first draft is very rough, and full of mistakes. I read it many, many times afterwards, making corrections, and then when I’m satisfied with it, I send it to my editor (and agent), and then she sends me back a ton of corrections and changes she wants made. I do most of them and re-write it, and the book goes back and forth that way for many months, while I correct it and polish it. And between rounds of working on that book, I work on others. And each time I come back to a book, I see new things I want to improve, polish, or change. I usually re-write a book off and on for well over a year, even a year and a half. And if I need historical research, or about an industry, or geography, my researcher gives it to me (to read and digest) before, during, and after the book, and I weave it in where I need it. So as you can see, it’s a long, arduous process."
____
I find that I work best when I ignore absolutely everything else. And the best inspiration for me comes from working hard, not from magically creating something out of nothing in five minutes. Hard work inspires me. I have always known that, but it was something I was particularly taken with after going to the gym, getting a haircut, and walking half an hour in the rain with 50 pounds of groceries. (You have good thinking, I find, when carrying heavy things.) Now I am sitting, listening to the rain and thunder, and all I can think is how much harder I want to work, how much better I will feel, once I do some of the things I have been putting off, often while I was living my life and just getting on with it all.
To me, there is nothing more important than inspiration. To feel inspired means to dream. To dream means to have hope. With hope, I feel I can do anything. And more than anything, I want to put my hopes and dreams to good work, to create.
While I don't subscribe to Eat, Pray, Love (though that mantra, as a whole, sits well with me) I do believe in the words she says as part of her TED talk. Namely, in a more condensed form, that genius is 1 percent inspiration, and 99 per cent perspiration.
But Gilbert says it more kindly than that. Instead, she talks about a writer's muse. Because, any writer that has written more than ten words, knows that feeling of being possessed by something. An idea, a desire to continue, an almost inhuman want to write, and write well. Danielle Steel, as much as she might not be considered literature's finest...still understand the written process very well. And her process mirrors mine, I find *Excerpts taken from Danielle Steel's blog:
Very early in my career ( I only had one baby when I started writing), I figured out that if you wait for time and the opportunity to present themselves—it never happens, and you don’t get anything done. So I made writing my priority, and I turned down just about everything else. For about 30 years, I never had lunch with friends, never broke into my writing time. The only greater priority in my life was my family, my children and husband. They always came first—but after that, I turned down just about everything else so I could write.
My process is that first I have an idea, and it may only be a tiny kernel of an idea, something that intrigues me. It may just be a thought, a tiny piece of something about a person, a news item, something in history, or a philosophy about life. I start making notes, and do so for several months usually, as the story emerges in my head. Sometimes I sit for hours, just staring into space, pursuing the idea. And then about the characters to go with it. And then one day, I sit down at my typewriter and write the outline for the story. By then, I pretty much know the story. And the outline tells the story chapter by chapter. The outlines are anywhere from 40 to 70 pages long. And then I go over the outline, correcting it and making changes. And when I’m comfortable with it, I send it to my editor and agent, and they suggest some changes. I make those changes if I agree with them, without compromising the essence of the book, and then send the outline to my publisher. And by then, it is a total mess, with things crossed out, corrected, written over, full of asterisks ( my editors hate the mess I make!! and beg me to change my typewriter ribbon more often, which I forget to do, and when I’m excited about what I’m writing). And then my publisher suggests changes too, so I do another re-write on the outline. And whenever I write, I do nothing else. That’s all I do, so as not be distracted from the book.
Once the outline is set, I put it away, and let it simmer for a while. And I am usually working on 3 to 5 different books, in various stages at the same time. I work it all the way through to the end of the story, and then put it away for a while, and it continues to cook somewhere, in the back of my head.
When I start a book, it is like climbing a mountain. Brutal, exhausting, an endurance contest. I start the book and don’t leave my desk until the first draft is finished. I work from the outline, but the book just flows on its own (like a movie I see and hear in my head—and sometimes even I’m surprised at what I’m seeing and hearing!) I cry at the sad parts, laugh at something funny one of the characters said. My life becomes totally populated by the people of the book. I don’t talk to anyone (except my kids when they call me), don’t return calls, don’t see anyone, and don’t leave the house. I go from my bed to my desk, to my bathtub at the end of my workday, then back to bed, and then back to work. I work about 20 to 22 hours straight, sleep for 3 or 4 hours, and then go back to work. And I do that until I have told the story and the first draft is finished. Michelangelo called it ‘stealing it from the stone’, when he carved a statue. I’m almost afraid to stop working at night because I’m afraid I’ll forget where I was going with the story, but I don’t forget. And I keep on going until I’m through. That first draft is very rough, and full of mistakes. I read it many, many times afterwards, making corrections, and then when I’m satisfied with it, I send it to my editor (and agent), and then she sends me back a ton of corrections and changes she wants made. I do most of them and re-write it, and the book goes back and forth that way for many months, while I correct it and polish it. And between rounds of working on that book, I work on others. And each time I come back to a book, I see new things I want to improve, polish, or change. I usually re-write a book off and on for well over a year, even a year and a half. And if I need historical research, or about an industry, or geography, my researcher gives it to me (to read and digest) before, during, and after the book, and I weave it in where I need it. So as you can see, it’s a long, arduous process."
____
I find that I work best when I ignore absolutely everything else. And the best inspiration for me comes from working hard, not from magically creating something out of nothing in five minutes. Hard work inspires me. I have always known that, but it was something I was particularly taken with after going to the gym, getting a haircut, and walking half an hour in the rain with 50 pounds of groceries. (You have good thinking, I find, when carrying heavy things.) Now I am sitting, listening to the rain and thunder, and all I can think is how much harder I want to work, how much better I will feel, once I do some of the things I have been putting off, often while I was living my life and just getting on with it all.
To me, there is nothing more important than inspiration. To feel inspired means to dream. To dream means to have hope. With hope, I feel I can do anything. And more than anything, I want to put my hopes and dreams to good work, to create.
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